NSFW - Fatback Media

Jessica Simpson is set to open a chain of BBQ restaurants called ‘Daisy Dukes’ that will feature scantily clad waitresses dressed in short-shorts.

The business plan was thought up by Jessica’s father and manager, Joe Simpson, 48.A source told America’s Life and Style Weekly magazine: “Joe’s going to make a lot of money from this.”

The flagship eatery will open in Las Vegas’ Caesar’s Palace next year, and Jessica will reportedly commit to make at least five appearances at the venue each year.
(source)

Well there’s nothing creepy about that at all. Except. Everything. The last thing I want when I’m getting waited on by a hot country chick dressed like she’s headed to a biker rally is her sweaty father sidled up to the bar, wiping his hands on his shirt and mumbling in my ear about what a great rack his daughter has. That said. What a great fucking idea. It’s like Hooters for hot southern chicks. The only problem is that there’s already a place like that. It’s called EVERY STEAK HOUSE BELOW Baltimore. Good try, though Joe. Great business plan. Why don’t you just become a photographer and take pictures of your own daughter for your collection. Right. You already did. So here are some pictures of April Scott, somebody else’s daughter who likes to wear Daisy Dukes. Get it? Because she’s the new…Whatever. Why do I try?

[Ed. note: Thank you to all you Spelly Spellertons who regularly write in with your witty comments about how bad I spell. It's called a copy editor, and I don't have one. I can spell and so can my spell check, but I can't type for shit. Plus, I write naked. That may not have anything to do with it, but I just wanted you to know that because we are such good friends. So thanks for the constructive criticism. Except, not.]