NSFW - Fatback Media

So, some quick site news for you while I type this on a circa 1950’s ARPANet keyboard from the basement of my private bunker. I’ve had the week off, and apparently so has my server and all the people who work at my hosting company. We’re trying get everything up and running but my laptop also crapped out because it is a dirty whore. Speaking of. Here are the top 10 whores of 2006.

1. My server. Whore
2. My Laptop. Whore
3. My databases. All whores.
4. The bitch who paid for her Starbucks this morning from a change purse using mostly pennies. Whore. (this is technically a 2007 whore, but I’m sure this bitch has been whorish for sometime.)
5. Britney Spears’ vagina. Red, chaffed Whore.
6. Lindsay Lohan’s vagina. Crabby, red whore.
7. Paris Hilton’s DNA. Every living cell = whore.
8. Gossip bloggers. All whores. But we love each other, right?
9. Perez Hilton. A real whore’s whore.
10. Mom. Still whoring after all these years.

Honorable mentions go out to Tara Conner and Katie Rees for whoring up the holidays. So. Hopefully I’ll have some good shit on deck later today, till then. Stay whorish you fucking whorey whores!